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[10 Mar 2009|08:28pm] |
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sorry lj, i found twitter. but ill still visit. :(
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[25 Jan 2009|02:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 creative |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Sara Barilles or whatever - Love Song |
] |
ok, derek told me i fail at livejournal. butttt if its any conselation i check it everyday to read pages!!!
nothing new, same old. i would probably update mopre if i had an interesting life. i just went to walmart? i got a new trashcan? YAY! :)
sooooo yeah exciting. I am going to bake today! i am going to make red velvet cake balls. you make the cake as directed, crumble it all up in a bowl and mix it with the cream cheese frosting and then make them into balls and dip them into chocolate. then you freeze yummy!!!!!
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| wednesday? |
[14 Jan 2009|08:13pm] |
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mood |
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 full |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Ludacris // Yous a Ho |
] |
yo. spaghetti for dinner. delish.
christina and alex say hi.
going to lavon tonight with matthew. sit on the back porch smoking and drink beer and talk about old times when gas was $1.30 and pluto was still a planet. good times will be had.
lots of errands for tomorrow. lunch with the daniels family for matts dad's bday and farmers market and sprouts and post office and banks and hopefully robbins brothers. but i wont get my hopes up
love and kisses
catherine
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| Buying a house? |
[13 Jan 2009|08:53pm] |
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mood |
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 anxious |
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music |
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Bob Marley // I Wanna Love You |
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I've been doing tonssss of research lately on buying a house. Matt and I are hoping to move sooner than later, I'm thinking a year or less. So far we have been budgeting and saving, and so far we have 50%-60% of the amount I'd like to have for a down payment. Its so scary though, there is so much to consider with 15 or 30 year loans and 80-20 and school districts and foundations and ahhh. I think we can afford up to $140k home but I think we want to shoot for alot lower, probably under 100K for our first home. I didnt realize how low a mortgage payment could be though, not too far off from what you'd pay in an apartment for our family size. So basically I need to clean up my credit with the little things here and there and I want to try and establish some credit with a gas card or something. Matt has excellent credit so we shouldn't have any problems getting a low interest rate. It's a buyers market right now so I am just trying to be informed as possible. I think we are going to start taking to banks and realtors soon. Yayyy for being a grown up! :) Advice??
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| Perilous Sandwich |
[12 Jan 2009|09:02pm] |
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music |
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Fergie // Myself & I |
] |
i ate a really good sandwich today at subway
garlic bread
turkey
american cheese
lettuce
tomato
black olives
onion
banana peppers
oil and vinger
salt and pepper
parmesan cheese
and now my hands smell like b.o.
but it was delicious.
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| Icky Toliet |
[10 Jan 2009|08:58pm] |
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mood |
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 apathetic |
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music |
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Christina Aguleria // Come on Over |
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hiiiiiiiii!
i jsut watched fantastic four, not too bad. i realy liked it, i think that im starting to get into superheros because of ender. its cool though, ill be the bad ass mom that gets him comic books and the latest action figures. :)
so i get up this morning and i didnt have my glasses and i went to take my morning piss, and i sit down do my thing in the dark and after i flush im still sitting there and water and sewage and nasty is flowing alll over my feet and the toliets running and running and i cant see and i started yelling and teh whole bathroom flooded and it was gross so i threw my bathtowels on it and went to work. AND i callled maintence and when i got home seven hours later my mom said they didnt even come by to fix anything, BUT they came and left a notice on my door that i owe them nineteen dollars. THE FUCK? but its okay, the bathroom is plunged and pinesoled everywhere and moped and sanitary now. good times. so tomorrow i have off and i havent decided what i am going to do yet, but it must be constructive. id ont know what yet and if i dont figure it out in the next fourteen hours i am going to get overwhelmed and end up sleeping all day. oy.
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| Chillin, Ender, Zoo |
[08 Jan 2009|10:15am] |
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music |
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Sara Barielles // Love Song |
] |
sup. so we didnt go to matts parents house, he got off work really late and we decided to stay home. i had a minor breakdown due to the severity of the schedule change. but i got over it :) me and mattie and laura and alex and bina all played apples to apples and matt and i got our moderate responsible drink on. it was really fun!
last night we were all outside smoking and ender opens the door and motions to all of us and is going CMON GUYS CMON WATCH TOYSTORY and he started getting really upset because we told him to wait a few minutes, and he goes EVERYBODY ANYBODY CMOOOOOONNN and like fell down in a collapsed heap it was so adorable. hes so my kid.
well, off to get my kids ready and to the ft worth zoo!! :)
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| Quick Post |
[07 Jan 2009|07:12pm] |
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mood |
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 rushed |
] |
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music |
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TI // Live Your Life |
] |
ahh chaos. i just walked in the door and there is so much to do tonight, but i am going to perservere with this journaling thing. my keyboard still sticks though, it makes typing quickly not happen so much.
buttttt tonight i have to clean out my car, load it up with diapers and strollers and cribs and toys and hopes and dreams and get myself and the kids bathed and ready by 9:30 when matthew gets home. we are going to stay out at his parent's house in lavon. it is so peaceful out there, you can see stars and stars and planets and stars and galaxies and its quiet, except for the coyotes and the cows. its really nice outside too so we can sit out on the big porch and smoke cigarettes and count shooting stars and talk :) i love it. his parents are the sweetest people too... its awesome, most people judge me and judge matt for dating me because i have children so young, but they have completely opened their home to us and have accepted them like their own grandchildren since day one. i now know where matt gets it from. i definatley need to pick up some parenting techniques from them. and tomorrow matt and i both have the day off so we are going to take ender and elle to the zoo. i dont know if we are going to go for dallas or fort worth, dallas is obviously closer but ft worth is so far and is 9 dollars more, but has better exhibits. we'll see. and i plan to take many many pictures.
well ender is throwing a tantum and alex is throwing kj around and trinity is crying about something and eleanor is in the bouncer laughing and bouncing her ass off. i think ill go hang out with eleanor. :) deuces
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| Good morning, beautiful! |
[06 Jan 2009|07:06pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 pensive |
] |
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music |
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Counting Crows // Mr. Jones |
] |
writers block,,, hmm...
so everyday i learn more about matt. i like that he is still a puzzle to me, like a rubics cube. i think i have one side figured out and then i look and the other side is all jumbled. its healthy, i love it. but one thing that i am noticing alot is how much he is showing me about myself.
like this morning. we always get in debates about alarms for waking up. i have to leave the house at 8:51 to make it to work on time. I can get up at the very latest at 8:35 and throw myself together. however every night, i set alarms for 7:30, 7:45, and 8:00, because i like to wake up early and mentally "prepare" myself for getting out of bed. matt finds this to be stupid, because we end up losing an hour of sleep. however, he has to set his alarm, to wake me up to get out of bed at 8:30. so this morning he rolls over and starts snuggling me and kissing my neck and whispering sweet nothings in my ear, and of course, i get out of bed feeling in love with the world and refreshed. he goes on to tell me later that he noticed that i get out of bed bitching and moaning everyday, but if he spends a few minutes refreshing me with love, i get up facing the world like its my oyster. :) how much of a turn is that from my previous relationships?? he puts a song in my heart and a dance in my step. its amazing how the feelings of love can completely transform my entire outlook on how my day begins.
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| Hello, 2009! |
[05 Jan 2009|08:10pm] |
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mood |
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 humbled |
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music |
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Primitive Radio Gods // Phonebooth |
] |
holy shit, lj has gotten quite advanced since i was last on here. i can bold and italic underline and anythinggg without coding. love it.
so id say it was my new years resolution to start journaling again, but no promises. its especially not promising when i decide to sit down and type something out and my keys on the right side of the keyboard get semi stuck everytime i click them. i think tea? alas, the turmoil of sharing a keyboard with peoples.
so things have really come a long way for me. i have two babies now, ender and eleanor. (2 and 8 months). I have a great guy in my life, Matthew, who has really saved me in a sense. he is one of the best people i have ever known, in all senses of the word. things went really south with james and he left back last april. matt has always been there for me and the minute james left he came into my life and was there for everything that the kids and i needed. it was really hard at first adjusting to all the bills and having to leave the kids at daycare so i could work full time again, especially eleanor, she was about 6 weeks old when i had to take her. but things are... awesome... for a lack of a more exciting word. marriage is in the future, not sure when yet, and babies. lots more babies. we are going to get a house eventually, we have already been saving and have a pretty good loose game plan. we have changed our lifestyles completely from blowing money on being drunks to working out several times a week and eating better. my diet used to consist of taco bell and jack in the box and now its been one month since i have eaten anything fast food. now my diet consists of granola and soy and green vegetables and lots of water. i feel so much better about my whole life.
it baffles me to read back at the person i was two, four years ago. i had so many things going for me that i could have done with my future. i let guys destroy my confidence and my ambitions. i gave way too much and got nothing in return. i am so glad that i dragged myself from that and stood up on my own two feet and am able to say that i love who i am. i am a smart, beautiful person and i deserve to be treated as such. i love everything i am and everyone and everything that i have.
so for this new years, my resolution is to grow. Grow and mature into the woman that my children deserve to have as a mother, and for the woman matt deserves to have as his wife.
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| :( |
[24 Nov 2007|12:19am] |
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i am so tired of trying.
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[29 Oct 2007|12:18pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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contemplative |
] |
Hello!
I don't know if anyone remembers me, I used to rub elbows with some very prestigious bloggers round these parts. I got the internets back in my domicle, I am so excited. I started reading this journal from the beginning again, something that I like to do once a year or so.
I just got an eye exam, and after 12 years of extensive contact wear, I am switching to glasses. I have medicaid so I had to get the cheap plastic glasses, and the least grandma looking pair is still not something I would have qualified as fashionable. But alas, its time to give my poor eyes a break.
So being on the internet for the first time in awhile, I've been studying the details of every program and website I use. Why does everyhing, i.e. Livejournal, Myspace, Facebook, AIM... all have an email inbox? Why can't we merge all these emails that I supposedly going to get into the email account that I use to log in with?
I missed you guys.
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| ring |
[11 Mar 2007|05:25pm] |
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mood |
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impressed |
] |
i love him :)
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| More Quizzes |
[07 Mar 2007|03:41am] |
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mood |
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 tired |
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music |
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Goo Goo Dolls // Name |
] |
Be warned, quizzes are addicting...
What Are Your Politics?
RESULT: Lefty
God, you're such an ass. (Get it? 'Cause an ass is a donkey, and a donkey is the mascot of the Democratic party? Funny, right? Whatever. Enjoy your free social services.)
Democrats are great, because they're usually sympathetic to all types of people, they're generous, and they're pretty good dancers. Most of the time.
What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
RESULT: Dream Girl
You've got it all – affection, a cool head, a positive attitude, and all that other stuff that guys want their girlfriends to have.
You're light-hearted, fun, romantic and not too sleazy – a great combination. When you start a relationship, there's a good chance the guy will totally fall for you, whether he intended to or not. Keep up the great attitude and you're sure to be a heartbreaker. (Please just try to be gentle.)
Love or Lust?
RESULT: Love
Hearts and rainbows all the way - you're a total romantic.
Animal lust is nice, but you'd rather be in love with someone before you start tearing them apart. When you're in a relationship, you generally treat the other person really well. You don't cheat, and you're respectful of their differences. And when you're not in a relationship, you're selective about the people you choose to kiss or even get crushes on.
You've got a great thing going on, but don't be afraid of letting that animal side come out every now and then. A couple bite marks never hurt anyone (much).
What's Your Sense of Humor?
RESULT: Witty
The Cadillac of senses of humor. Smart, sophisticated, and people either love you or just roll their eyes at you.
If you've never watched any of those "Brit-Coms," go out and rent them – you'll love them. If you've already seen them, well, it shows. You've got a great mind and a great sense of humor. Now if only we could do something about your sense of style. (Just kidding. You look hot. Really.)
Purity Test
RESULT: Fairly Filthy
It looks bad, but there's still hope for you! (Hopefully.) Just try to avoid R-rated movies and anything with a warning label.
On the eSPIN Purity Scale (patent pending), you score 3 Purity Points out of 6. Which makes you 50% pure, give or take a couple Jell-O shots. That puts you, oh, let's see – halfway between good and evil. So, which way will the totter teeter? That's up to you and your conscience. Oh, and Oprah. Oprah has a say with pretty much everything.
The eSPIN Personality Test
RESULT: Cucumber
You know - as in "cool as a cucumber." Because there's no cooler vegetable than you.
You've got a great attitude going on - friendly, laid-back, open to new experiences. Anyone should want to hang out with you, and if they don't - well, that's their problem, not yours. Just let it roll off your back. We're pretty sure you do that anyway.
Don't be afraid to show a little attitude every once in a while - it's cool being cool, but it's also pretty nice to get your way and influence the people around you. A little bit. We wouldn't want you to lose your cucumber-ness.
What's Your Mental Age?
RESULT: Middle Aged
Regardless of how old your body is, up in your head, you're paying mortgages and complaining about back pain.
That's great that you're so mature, but remember: it's okay to cut loose and act young every once in a while. Do your wild side a favor and stay up past 10:00 one night this week.
How Will You Die?
RESULT: Peacefully In Your Sleep
You're smart, you're healthy and you don't let anger or stress get the best of you. But even the best of us gotta go sometime.
Wanna die in a more adventurous way? We recommend taking up one (or all) of the following hobbies: glass eating, chemical mixing, hijacking, or poking grizzly bears with sticks and calling them "jerkface."
Which Sexy Are You?
RESULT: Intellectual Sexy
You've got that smooth, mature kind of sexiness that does really well at Sudoku conventions or just about anywhere.
You've got a bit of the Geek in you, which you stealthily use to your advantage. After all, there's nothing sexier than being smart about what you want and going after it. You have the potential to wow 'em with your choice words and profound insight. Just be sure to find a suitable balance between confidence and kindness. Have courage to speak your mind, but don't forget about giving all your honeys all the love and attention they deserve. (After all, they were smart enough to go for you.)
What's Your Kissing Style?
RESULT: Romantic Kisser
Beware of your kiss – it's been known to make people fall in love.
To you, kisses are the finest expression of love. (And you love being in love.) You think that the best kisses happen when the feelings are strong and the love vibes are pumping at maximum speed. That doesn't mean you're a traditional kisser, though – you love to mix it up with creative kisses and keep things interesting. Kissing is an art, and when you get going you're like Picasso.
What's Your Top Emotion?
RESULT: Happy
OMG LOL :)
Wide-eyed and smiling, you can find the bright side of any situation and the good qualities in anyone (even if they're pelting you with cat poo). Your energy ranges from giddy excitement to mellow calm, but you hardly ever lose your cool, positive energy. Plus, you're pretty good at managing all the bad stuff in a healthy way. Go you! Now go use your superpowers to help out the less fortunate.
What's Your Addiction?
RESULT: Love Junkie
You're a total sucker for anything that knows how to kiss. (As long as it's cute.)
Of course, being a website called eSPINtheBottle, this is our very favorite addiction. Just remember to be cautious, have an expert nearby and always wash your hands when you're done. Oh wait, those are the rules for petting strange animals. Well, you know what we mean.
What's Your Secret Talent?
RESULT: Reading People's Minds
Bet you already knew that, right?
There's not really any point in explaining any more of this to you, since you probably already know what we'd say. But if you're one of those non-believers, who's still not even sure you have ESP, we recommend you open your mind and start exploring your new-found talent. Great places to start: phone conversations with your crush, final exam week, and, of course, "Jeopardy."
Take all These Quizzes at http://www.espinthebottle.com/quiz.phtml?ct_link_id=home_quiz
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| Quiz |
[07 Mar 2007|01:09am] |
| [ |
music |
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Goo Goo Dolls // Big Machine |
] |
 You’ve got it all – affection, a cool head, a positive attitude, and all that other stuff that guys want their girlfriends to have.
You’re light-hearted, fun, romantic and not too sleazy – a great combination. When you start a relationship, there’s a good chance the guy will totally fall for you, whether he intended to or not. Keep up the great attitude and you’re sure to be a heartbreaker. (Please just try to be gentle.)
Take This Quiz!
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| Relationship Survey |
[05 Mar 2007|01:36am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 chipper |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Fall Out Boy // Sugar We're Going down |
] |
1. Have you ever cheated on someone you were dating?
Yeah, I think I have successfully cheated on all of my boyfriends after 2003, two of which I was dating simultaneously for five or six months.
2. Have you ever broken someone's heart?
Supposedly a few. but they got over it pretty quick. so I would say no. one for sure back in highschool, that was definately some bitch shit on my part.
3. Have you ever broken up with your boyfriend/girlfriend for their best friend?
Yes, twice. Well one and a half... once for realz and the second was more backhanded I suppose.
4. Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?
One... but I wouldn't say it was majorly abusive. But I think any relationship that even has a few violent action would be considered abusive, or at least strongly unhealthy. I think I got pushed on the ground, slammed into a wall, and smacked in the face. But I got mine, so no big.
5. Is there one ex you would go back out with if you could?
I wouldn't leave James for anyone. But if I were suddenly single there's a quality one in there I wouldn't mind recycling.
6.How many people have you said I love you to?
I think I have said that I love everyone that I speak to more than like three times haha. But like say it for that "boyfriendgirlfriend" thing... I would sayyyy ten. Damn I'm a little "i love you" whore.
7. How many did you actually love?
I loved them all on some level, and I still do. But like that was healthy, good, if I was thinking clearly would literally spend the rest of my life with them? Two.
8. Have you ever had your heart broken?
No one has ever had their heart broken, they would have fucking died. Just Kidding. I know what you mean, I just like to be difficult. I can't really say that I have ever really been broken hearted. I have been like damn this shit sucks... I think the worst I have ever felt is when a guy that I really cared about hardcore rejected me. That sucked. Or when another guy constantly chose drugs over me. But I can't even say those were personal things, because now I understand that in the first situation, the guy tried to like me, but it just didn't click for him, and in the second, that obviously wasn't a me thing because I'm fucking amazing.
9. Have you ever thought you were going to marry someone?
Yeah. I talked about being Mrs. _____ with pretty much every boyfriend I had since I was 14. I think out of my exs Shawn was the only guy that I ever really wanted to marry and totally saw myself marrying. All the other ones I don't think I really would have carried it out. But I found my hubby now, and I know I'm going to marry his bitch ass. :)
10. Ever dated someone you wish you never would have?
Oh good lord. Let's see, out of ten, I would say that I would have dated two. Three MAYBE just for shits and giggles. But, alas, I wouldn't literally trade it.
11. How many serious relationships have you been in?
Three relationships that majorly affected my life. 4 that were semi serious, and 3 that were a joke.
12. Who was your first love, and do you still love them?
Shawn Arani. You never stop loving your first love.
13. Do you think that nothing compares to your first love?
Of course. Nothing ever compares to a first experience of any kind. You discover things about yourself in first loves that you carry with you the rest of your life, and you always remember that person and associate them with those first experiences. Think about it this way, you'll always remember your first kiss vividly. Those late night at a bar drunk kisses that you barely remember the next morning don't even compare. It doesn't mean you can never find a love more strong and more successful, but theres always some peaceful naiveity to your first love. Good lord that was longer than necessary.
14. Does everyone have a soul mate?
No, where the hell did that concept come from anyways? First of all, there are more women in the world than men. So saying that people are predestined to have a "soulmate" isn't even fair because there would be people that didn't have a soulmate. Unless you bring in the homosexual relationships, but I am not even touching that issue. Secondly, people having the predisposition that said soulmate exists keeps them from forming healthy relationships. We see on TV and movies this fanciful journey of love, and no one ever experiences that truely. So a woman (or man) could spend her whole life looking for that guy that made her "weak at the knees" or whatever and never realize that she can find contentment and love in Harry the bald office assistant. Thirdly, what does a soul have to do with anything? Some mystical notion that before we are here on earth our "souls" were floating around in the cosmos and "picked" eachother from the foundations of the earth, and set forth on a journey to be reunited in this earthly domain? Give me a break. And people can believe this but when the waitress says, "dont touch the plate, its hot" we have to test the theory by touching the plate?
15. Do you regret anything in your past?
Not really. I mean I don't have anything that day after day I internally torment myself and think "whyyyy?? how could I have donee that?!!" I don't really care that much honestly.
16. Do you think you're a bad girlfriend/boyfriend?
I am a fucking EXCELLENT girlfriend. I wish I could date me. I am the sweetest, most understanding, caring woman in the world. My downfall is I am extremely insecure so I find the most fucked up boyfriends that like to see how crazy they can make me become.
17. Have you ever known you were supposed to be with someone, but the time didn't work out?
No, because then obviously I wasn't supposed to be with them? I don't believe in soulmates, but I believe everything happens for a reason, a reason that is above me and definately for good. Even if it seems like a really shitty occurance.
18. Ever seen fireworks when kissing?
Twice. Same person.
19. Can long distance relationships work?
Nope. Long distance calls are great and all, but we are human. We need to get some. People are only as faithful as their options, and someone's always running around on the side. Not to say they don't "love" each other. I mean if you can say that cheating would still keep the relationship together I suppose then yes it "works". But one and/or both parties WILL cheat. WILL. I promise.
20. Are you still in love with any of your exs?
that's a big, hard, NEGATIVE.
21. If you could say anything to your ex's, what would it be and who would it be to?
Dude, this is a dumb question.
22. Have you ever fallen for your best friend?
Yeah, twice. It's the best way to be in a relationship.
23. Have you ever begged for someone's attention?
*grumbles* yes I'm tragically pathetic.
24. Have you ever wanted to kill yourself after breaking up?
No, that's retarded. THAT is what you would call a severely unhealthy relationship, not to mention an extremely unhealthy human being. If you really have to invest that much of yourself in another human being (who are untrustworthy and weak minded, btw) that if they reject you, you literally have no will to live, then DO IT because we don't need you breeding. It's the theory of natural selection, put into play.
25. Are you happy with your relationship status?
Aye, aye! It's not the most functional, but who's to say that anyone's relationship is completely functional? I think what you are supposed to learn out of every relationship experience that you have is that people aren't perfect, and no one you find ever will be. You will have fights. You will get on eachother's nerves. You will want to hurt them when they hurt you. You will cry. You will loathe the day you met them. But when it comes down to it you don't give up on someone, because deep down you don't want them to not be there. Even if the last thing you want to do is speak to them, you still want them right next to you. I guess that is why I don't regret anything. Because through all the shitheads I had to deal with, I found the person that I want to kick in the middle of the night for taking all the blankets.
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| im still waiting for my ruca.. |
[24 Feb 2007|06:47pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 devious |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Sublime // Waiting for my Ruca |
] |
i can't stop playing Ruca.
its like a curse. but i
like it. so i dont mind
it that much. it makes me
want to dance. BO! BO!
its making everyone else
crazy, but i think that
im ok with that as well.
i was about to come here
to post the lyrics, but
then i realized that i
already did. thus the
obligation to write out
something. since i made
the effort to open the box
and all. i think im going
to go take a shower and
get beautiful. ill holla.
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| my eyes are mad at me |
[24 Feb 2007|01:41pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 hungry |
] |
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music |
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Spin Doctors // Two Princes |
] |
my eyeballs are mad at me. i have these contacts that you can leave in for a month and then change them. its of course adviceable to take them out once in a while... but i haven't. im really senstive to light and like if wind blows in my eye direction it stings. my right eye is bloodshot. it sucks. so i took a break from wearing them for a few days. which sucks cause i broke my only pair of glasses about two years ago when i wore them to bed drunk. andd i can't see to save my life. i got new makeup i really want to try out but since my eyes hurt i figure that putting foreign substances so close to my already pissed off eyeballs isn't a good plan.
ender is six months old today. i haven't done anything to mame his upbringing, so maybe I am not so bad at this parenting thing. :)
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princesscat's journal
